Almost ten years ago I also wrote about this man. I am not a writer but the article (which was published in the official paper of PMC) came from the deepest part of my heart that many who were able to read it were moved because it was genuine. It was about my sentiment as a young bride, left off by her young marine officer husband three days after our wedding day. He left because he was needed in Mindanao during which the fight between the Government and its enemy was at its height.
“It is my duty to defend helpless people in Mindanao from the tyranny of the government’s enemy” was all he said to me when asked if he could stay a while longer. Relatively just out of his beloved academy, he was full of ideals and thought of nothing but service for his country. In the simplest way, many were able to relate to me and appreciated their husbands’ efforts to function both as head of their family and the unsung hero of our country.
With God as his protector, this tall, dark, Marine stayed for several years in the “area” fighting battles. Ruthless to the enemies, he was the “Braveheart” of my life. God first, his country second, were over and above his own personal whims. For me, he was a true selfless patriot. He remained loyal to everything he stood for before we got married, an unsung hero of some sort, of the country, AFP, and Marine Corps. Who else can be prouder than the woman behind this man?
But at some point I stopped being mesmerized by his selflessness. It felt like he was too much of a hero for others, for even when he was no longer in the “field” he was still always at work. Always thinking, planning, and doing something for the office he was being assigned to. Everywhere he went, he was always into improving things that needed improvement, believing in his heart that consolations follow one’s love for his work. Although my heart bled for him knowing that he was underappreciated and undervalued at times, I torture him by subtly letting him feel that he was neglecting me and the children, that he was effortless in keeping his family happy and that he loves me less. He was a hero no more in my perception; but he just continued doing what he was doing despite my waning support.
Ten years of marriage is not an assurance that you know your better half that well! I judged him wrongly when I thought of him as someone who does not care for me. When I was diagnosed to have an AML, he showed me that he will be there for me too when I needed him most. There was never a time that he was not at my side. Without hesitation he gladly accepted the RHAC he was placed into, despite knowing the fact that it is something that would surely hurt his military career. He did not mind not being able to follow the military pattern he wanted so much until he saw me well and out of danger.
I am now sure that heroism is something innate in him, helping those in need, be it a family member or anybody else. I now clearly see that selfless act of disregarding his own need to be with his bride during the battle in Mindanao was genuine! He is not perfect! He snores loud, he disturbs my sleep. His mouth stays open in our long talks and he looks at me as if I talk in Chinese. He hates reading and deliberately misinterprets things to get away with reading. He is not funny. He has all the imperfections I thought I could NOT live with.
But all these imperfections are compensated by HIS FEAR AND LOVE FOR THE LORD! No one may ever know how loyal he is to this country, he may never get the chance to realize the goals and good visions he has for the present organization where he belongs, but as his partner in life I would always thank the Lord he was born so that I can have and possess the greatest gift I can have in this lifetime!
As I rejoice in my first victory over my cancer I have to thank him for being obedient to the Sovereign Lord’s command on the day we got married . . . For richer and for poorer, in SICKNESS and in health, till death do us part. Finally I thank GOD that I come only second in my husband’s heart, as Jesus Christ is the first! He may commit mistakes along the way, but I am assured he will return to the right path as his loyalty is to HIM!
by: Maria Ella Regondola Cabanlet
August 3, 2010,